“Beer before liquor, never been sicker.
Liquor before beer, you’re in the clear”

This was the rhyme Heidi recited to me when I nervously asked if having whiskey as a first drink was a bad idea.

I arrived at Phil and Heidi’s place in the West Village at 9:30 or so. Phil and Heidi are old friends who lived in Seattle when I was there a few years ago. When Phil heard of my experiment he promptly contacted me offering his assistance.

Phil is a large, imposing man. The sort of guy you’d want sober in your corner when you’ve had too many drinks and bump into someone that takes offense. He’s from Connecticut so naturally we bonded over our East Coast heritage when we met in Seattle. It’s not easy finding a Patriots fan in Seattle.

Having been a bartender-on-the-fly for a few years, Phil decides to whip me up a mixed drink containing whiskey, of all things.

“So what are we making?” I ask as he starts mixing ingredients into a metal container.

“A variant on a whiskey ginger.”

I stop to consider.

“I was told to avoid whiskey”.

“Yeah, well, you know,” he laughs. “People will tell you lots of things.”

He pour the whiskey into the glass and looks at me.

“I would probably avoid people buying you shots of …well, anything.”

Duly noted.

I managed to get the ingredients out of Phil for a drink that he calls “a fancy whiskey ginger”. His concoction consists of:

Elder Flower liqueur

Whiskey - cheap local American single malt

Ginger beer

A dash of bitters

I especially enjoy the fact that I’m about drink something that contains “a dash of bitters”. It makes me feel like a sophisticated gentleman. Even though I’m about as sophisticated as a rock right now.

I take the drink and we move out onto the balcony which overlooks the West Village and has an amazing view of the Empire State Building, among other things. This is the kind of place I could see myself living. There’s a nice breeze coming off the water and I can hear sounds of people milling about below us.

The first sip is … interesting. I can take the ginger beer a lot, which is probably good. The whiskey is something I can only describe as harsh. It didn’t taste anything like I expected. I wasn’t sure how fast to drink it so I tried to keep an eye on Phil and drink mine slower than he’s drinking his. I figure he’s a bigger guy and has a better tolerance so I shouldn’t be downing my drink before him.

We start talking about boutique distilleries - a conversation brought on by the local whiskey in my drink - and how common locally made spirits are becoming. Phil surmised that he would be unlikely to find this particular whiskey again because of the sporadic nature of the boutique stuff he’s been buying.

After this, we moved onto the drinking age in America. A lot of people are surprised to find that my position on the subject is to lower the drinking age. We talked about Vermont and how they resisted raising the drinking age to 21 for so many years, and how kids in other countries with lower drinking ages don’t treat alcohol with the taboo sort of behavior we do here in America. The three of us posited that people would be more responsible adults if the drinking age was lower and they got it out of their system at a younger age.

I started to feel the drink effecting me a little bit. I got a dull throbbing in the back of my head which I hadn’t experienced before. I can only describe it as similar to a caffeine-withdrawal headache. My stomach started feeling odd - almost empty, which didn’t make sense as I just had dinner. I didn’t feel any different otherwise. When I got up to use the restroom I felt fine.

We finished our drinks and walked a few blocks to a new bar/restaurant called Joseph Leonard - a place named after the owner’s two grandfathers. It was small in a good way and we got seats at the bar pretty quickly. Everyone was friendly and even the owner came over to say hello.

I’m not sure how much of this is due to Phil being so gregarious and meeting people easily, but I felt like this was exactly what I’d been missing. I was hanging out in a bar in New York City flanked on either side by old friends and having conversation with the bartender, proprietor, and various other patrons. The ease with which we walked in and made new friends was impressive.

Heidi declared that I should try a white wine and they selected an Austrian wine off the menu called Schwarzbock Gruner Veltliner. That sure sounds exotic to me, so I agreed. The wine was a lot less harsh than the whiskey. After a few sips I felt like I could taste the fruit a bit when it hit my tongue. I did come to the conclusion that the alcohol taste was going to have to take some getting used to. I felt like I was swallowing something I shouldn’t be.

After about three quarters of a glass I got up to use the restroom and I could feel my balance was slightly off. It was almost as if my equilibrium was slower than normal, not reporting the changes in direction until a few moments after they’ve happened. I tried to look as casual as possible as I closed the door to the one-person restroom behind me and looked in the mirror.

I looked normal.

Was I drunk?

I thought about behind on a boat for a few hours in rough seas and then coming onto land. You feel like the boat is still moving below you and your body tries to compensate, which makes you feel a little odd walking around on dry land. This is very much what I was experiencing. I tried talking to myself a little bit and thinking of some hard things to see if my speech or mental capacities were limited but I felt completely fine.

In retrospect, I should have asked Phil and Heidi about it. I have no idea why I didn’t. Maybe I was just trying to fit in? I’ll have to keep an eye on this sort of thing in the future. Trying to fit in could get me into trouble if I’m not careful.

We stayed at Joseph Leonard for a little under two hours. Before I headed back to Brooklyn at 12:45ish.

Here’s a recap of the drinks of the night:

“Fancy” whiskey ginger at Phil’s

Glass of Austrian white wine

A taste of Heidi’s white wine

A taste of Phil’s white win

A drop of “the good stuff” - a single malt whiskey Phil ordered.

All in all I think it was a successful night. I made up for not doing much of anything for the first few days. On the train ride home I wondered if I’d feel terrible the next day. I was drinking a lot of water to offset the dehydration which is what most hangovers stem from. This morning I woke up feeling completely fine.

Tonight is Friday. What’s next in store for me?